9.11.2015 Sunday - Frank Auerbach

530 a.m. Walking to the KLCC, I listen to John Wilson speaking to the painter, Frank Auerbach who in his 80s still paints daily. Not for the whole day but a few hours daily. It gives me an idea about what else to occupy myself with, when the architecture doesn't need me as much. Something creative, something I can do on my own to express myself, with encouragement and review from my peers, something new yet related to my interests and skills and something that I might be able to earn some income from. The final chapter of a creative life. Painting, I thought - abstracts from street scenes and architecture. Maybe some figures... 

I'll start soon, as I turn 61.

8.11.2025 Saturday - breakfast and a visit with the doctor

 I bring Sam to meet Naz and Jennifer over breakfast, he and Sam hit it off - both are chatty with stories to tell about children and aging parents. One cannot help be stricken by Sam when she chooses to turn on the charm. 
After the heavy breakfast - we head off for my review; the doctor appears happy with my ankles. He says that they are healing nicely - I wonder how can things heal overnight. Perhaps they do if you use PRP (platelet rich plasma) to promote healing, he prescribe 6 weeks of active rest (maybe no squash or tennis) but anything else is fine. He got serious when he talked about the high BP, he reads me well - he knows I'll try and 'heal' myself  but he reasons that given my regime now - there is not much else I can do to lower my blood pressure. And that perhaps the reason is genetic and if I want longevity, (he thinks that I am a candidate for sudden death if I don't do something about this) I should go on medication. 

After seeing the GP, I am officially taking medication for my hypertension (an ARB which helps to dilate the blood vessels and reduce the load on my heart) In the evening, we have a long and crowded dinner with PH and his family, GL, JM, SL, Sarah Lim (who says that she needed the comfort which comes with our company). After dinner, and the first dose of Valsartan - my BP is 125/76

7.11.2025 Friday - sedated and probed

Today is the first time I have ever been in a hospital as a patient; we arrive at 1 p.m., and wait to be admitted. I change into the gown and wait. There is a lot of waiting. Finally I am lying down in the hospital bed, and waiting. At 5pm, I am wheeled into the OT - I recall chatting to Dr. Thomas, the anesthetist and admiring how comfortable they were making me; warm air is pumped into my gown, I am given a soft gel pack to rest my chin on (I am in a prone position). There is a grumble about how high my blood pressure is, but before I can give it more thought - I must have gone under because the next thing I recall is waking up with a dizzy head, in front of the observation bay. At the back of my mind, I remember that we have a dinner date with Laila, Yasmin, and Ileana - Sam has been in touch with them - dinner is postponed. PH is very kind, he drops by to have dinner with SA, and later to send us back to the apartment. I cannot feel my ankles nor my heels, no pain nor twinges just some discomfort. 

Tomorrow, I have to return for a review session with Dr. Rajesh, and to see the GP about my blood pressure. 

6.11.2025 Thursday - apartment staycation

I go for an early morning walk ahead of a full day of trials and tribulations. I am due to be assessed by good Dr. Rajesh, who will see if something can be done with my ankles. After which, we have a family dinner with the usual culprits - at the Kingdom Palace, which is good as I find myself looking forward more and more to the food rather than the company.

Dr. Rajesh talks about the 3 bones that form my ankle, and how one of the joints has been immoblised which forced the tendons to over compensate and work inefficiently, causing chronic pain. He schedules a procedure to fix this situation, it takes place tomorrow (Friday). It would require me to be sedated, it will take about an hour and I should be as good as new. I'm relieved, and though this would be my time in a hospital and am also looking forward to painful walking.

Dinner is excellent, the company lives up to my expectation; SKM is sharp and funny, she's the main reason I show up, FIL relates stories about his healing, I don't pay attention to my SIL, Sydney is warning up to us after all these years and PC, he has his problems - I do feel for him. 

5.11.2025 Wednesday - framing more ideas

 

4.11.2025 Tuesday - a good day to start with

We have a good discussion with the school team - casual around my station, sharing the mouse - sketching with fat pencils and interrupting each other. We are able to come to a conclusion about the kindy garden, the auditorium form and the undercroft space. This will prepare us for the meeting later today with the full team. In the afternoon, Sean and I go to meet PH and TY - I want Sean to get comfortable with clients, and to have a break from drawing. He has known TY from TY's internship days - we find out that we are all first born sons, who typically carry the brunt of familial responsibilities; a curse. 

After lunch, we present our IBPJ project, which is well received though the client has some decisions to make before final submission. I mark up the plans as 'notes of meeting' for PH to relay to the others. We return to join the big group discussion for the school; to clear the direction for the submission of the schematic design report next week. Fiona is in charge, she seems relieved the ideas, and directions are confirmed at the meeting. 

I decide that directors birthday should celebrated with a long lunch which lasts until dinner

We have a good team, and it is a pity the dynamics are not observed by some people who are dear to me, and to the people in the office. They would have been so proud of how everyone has grown and perhaps even helped in the nurturing of these young people themselves. But alas, no - not enough time is spent at the office to have any lasting impression. It hurts me to think of this, that others regard us as a good working model, but those closer to us are not familiar with it. 

They seem unaware of our work load, targets, strategies, problems and celebrations - perhaps I have done too well in shielding her from the realities of practice (and in doing so, also obstructed her view of the mini successes and achievements; the small hurrah moments when we have a scheme approved, a compliment from a client, a design problem solved. Because they are not physically here with us, they miss out and become more and more detached. 

I do not expect any change, I will have to change. I am not sure the methods yet but they have to decide if and when they want to be in the fold, In the meantime, head down, bums up. SO far there is no nurturing from them either, it is a good thing that I am a first born, a weed which can grow from the cracks of a concrete pavement, and thrive with infrequent watering and attention.

I have a team in the office, not at home, I am a team of one

3.11.2025 Monday - a walk, a test followed by another

Second of the early morning walk - run, to test my ankles and my commitment to lowering blood pressure, reduce heat rate, and body weight. I don't find it difficult to wake at 5 a.m. and  wander downstairs and out the door, it is quite refreshing to be out so early (again). The park has its regulars of morning walkers, mostly senior citizen and quite fast. I return after an hour and 7000 steps later, shower and take my blood pressure. I like these figures, I re-test in the evening so how they fare.